Human

I don't understand people.

I don't.

Get up

was using my Iphone5 front camera to take this picha,not bed eh.ney ney

(Ignore my grammer mistake thank you)

With my favorite songs from MMOTHS ( as i probably know that most of you don't know who is this,it's a DJ,i love his music,so inspiration and it is the first time i could listen to some music,i could feel my soul deep inside there)

Got some inspiration to blog about something about my life,recently.

My life has totally changed,since when?hmmm let me recall back.

Since last year?Since past few months?

Actually i can't really ensure when was it,because people do change ,tiny ...little by little

Until the day when you looked back all the memories,the path

then only when you're realize how fragile human is

I can't really specific about based on my changes,but i'm pretty much sure that

I'm no longer the small little girl.

Yes,celebrated my 21st birthday with family and friends 

The reason why i choose to go Kuala Lumpur to have my birthday celebration

As if it could be the most memorable birthday celebration ever.

Unfortunately ,it wasn't.

It was the worst birthday i ever had,the exact same day.

Something just happened so unexpected .

Since i was a kid,in many ways ,i always felt that i'm a transparent to others.

I felt so inferior and unspecial.

I've always felt that way.

So it leads to when comes to my birthday ,i don't really had a real birthday celebration like having a GREAT party session,i just received the wishes from everyone and that's it.

I used to care how people think about me.

Seriously,it feels sucks.That you have to try and guess ,wondering what's on their mind.The worst feeling ever

And that is how i became a sensitive girl .

Because i'm the transparent,so it's like i need to put a lot more effort to get myself noticed.

But don't get me wrong,my parents treat me very well.very loving and caring.

And this is when,since childhood time

I feel nothing when it comes to my birthday , supposedly It should be a big day!

Wonderful,memorable,sweet,exciting,amazing,etc....whatever words could describe for birthday

But,i found out that,every single year, i celebrated it with my family.

We would have our simple dinner ,a small birthday cake with a birthday song.

I found out this is how i normally celebrate my birthday ,and after years and years

I'm already get used to it.

Birthday seems not really that exciting for me anymore.

Even there's few years,i could remember vividly

I count down my birthday ,alone myself in the kitchen

I took out one of the fererrocher chocolate,and put one candle on top of it

Sing birthday song for myself ,make a wish ,candle blowing ,opened up the chocolate and finish it.

My thought of that time was ,i think it is totally fine with me,it may sound weird for you guys but

this is it :)

I always being left out by others,it came worse when i was in secondary school life.

I always prefer EVEN number than ODD number

Because when it comes to odd number,they will be the partner and getting into pairs,i'm always the odd one out.

Or maybe,i'm too invincible  (WAS)

which was why i feel comfort when there's the time i'm with my boyfriend (WAS)

At least,i'm having a partner :)

Am from a very strict family,i'm the youngest.

my brothers and sister are, so introvert and quite ,and i found out i could not let things continue like this.

I want a happy family so i be the clown .

Until now i'm 21,i'm still the clown.

I'm happy doing that,because i could see the changes.

at least,it bring happiness to my family :)

So in house.i'm a clown

With best friends,i'm the craziest

When i get back to my room...Oh my...It's finally the real me...

Take out my iphone or Ipod ,listening to some musics

Take out some books and read

You might surprised that,Stephanie is reading books?!

Yes :) don't know since when,i just feel like i need to change

When i no idea where to start from,i just start from the most basic one 

I bought some english novel when i was in KL,my birthday :)

[[28/2,woke up early in the morning

Having brunch with mom and dad

After brunch,we went book store and i came across with some novels 

Then i suddenly remember there's a friend of mine,very good in english

He told me once that his mom force him to study when he was a kid

but he fell in love with studying novels after few years later.

Well,i was thinking that...maybe i should give myself a try too...

Then after done shopping,went dinner with friend as well.

It was so damn simple but i love it.]]

Ah,not forgot to mention that i'm officially complete my diploma ,not to say graduate haha.
And so this is the stage that i'm wondering
which path should i choose?
working or further study?Well i think i will choose study.
After  complete all my studies then only i be the full time workaholic .

NOW**
-Now i'm already 21,i don't need a partner , because i realize that there's no one you can really trust or rely one.So be independent.
-And now i finally know that some specific situation friendship is more important than relationship
Friends for life,but lover will break up someday,somehow.
-I'm no longer afraid of how people think about me,because my happiness based on doing the things i like.
-I'm no longer afraid of ODD numbers,because in life there are something are not only meant to be understood it,but to be accepted.
-And still,there are no excitement when comes to my birthday haha!But i personally love Christmas so much.
-Now i'm already get used to it with my life,i love doing things alone...
Watch movie alone,shopping alone,drive my car here and there alone.Most importantly is,stay in my room alone and rest.

most important is
-I gotta be strrong!!!!!!!

And i've list down that the things i wanna achieve.So everything starts from a planning.

Somehow i realize one thing,if i have RM5000 with me ,how would i plan to send that money?
If previously,i can 100% confirm that will buy those branded stuff
BUT NOW,i rather go for a long vacation,instead of LV.
Explore this beautiful world 


Last but not least, i want to thanks those people who bought me present
Thank you guys so much,appreciate <3 p="">Althou my 21st birthday is not that amazing enough but
thanks to Albee my bestie ,damn she successfully shed my tears .


Went dinner together and suddenly came out with this 4 little small cakes.Awww how adorable <3 p="">Thank you <3 p="">You made my life more even colorful than ever.

Ok,so now here is some random photos.

*Work so hard to slim down my face man.*


*No kidding,my very first La Senza*

The early birthday celebration with family :)








 

That's all :)

Good night look LOL


P/S : my health problem is reaching red light already i guess
I can't breathe when i'm sleeping.
and my gastric became more even serious after food poisoning

FML

19/1/2013

LOOL,finally it's my first 2013 post
Sorry to be say that this post ain't gonna be a long or proper post
I was just wondering how long have i neglected my blog?
Surprisingly,it has been 1 month i never touch my bloggie
I can't imagine that,seriously
I was quite addicted to blog,blogging all the while
Blogging was my first priority since i was Form 4?
Then it turns to red light after i completed my last semester
To be frank,i only took 2 subjects this semester
It sounds like it should be very free and goyang kaki all the while ,i know -.-"
But i ended up with busying working working and working
I can't believe that i'm in love with being a workaholic
Same goes to be a shopaholic ,just a different job scope :)
One is to earn,one is to spend
Luckily im training myself a habit on SAVING MONEY wohow $$$
I got myself a target ,and i gonna make it come true by achieving it
For sure it should be a secret now,because i would prefer prove it with the outcome straight away
Rather than talking bullshit all the day ,and got nothing to prove what has been achieved

Okay,except for being a damn workaholic,i'm busying with my new house for sure :)
So excited for my room because it's all plain white hahaha
I picked out all the furniture (for my room) in white color
As simple as possible,i have no idea since when i'm a sucker for WHITE
But no white flag laaaa XD
And other stuffs will be a contrast color for white,so guess it :)

Left another few weeks to go,then it's finally our Chinese New Year!!!
Not so excited for that but i'm glad i'm moving soon
and a new place for my 21st chinese new year celebration
Hell yeah :D

SO basically,i'm becoming such a lazy ass
So lazy to do anything
so,i'm death meat LOOL
Hopefully i could get something to be inspired
and be motivated

I'm so lazy!!!


Lastly,my wishes for this year
1) Tiffany & Co.
2) more perfumes
3) new watch,no idea what brand should go for it
4) black and long hair
5) Go travel AGAIN


By the way,i got two new rabbits
I love them so much
Thats all haha

Kthxbye

12/12/2012

好久没回来了
大家都还好吗？

今天12月12日，是个很特别的日子
在这特别的日子里 我想说的是
珍惜身边人

听大家说，世界末日快到了 是吧？
他们都说 到时没有太阳 没有日光 没有水 没有电 没有电讯
什么都没有
听起来，有点恐怖
看了那些世界末日的video
挺恐怖的

我最近陪妈咪的时间好多 都陪她走来走去的
散心，之前都忙于学业 工作和朋友
有点忽略了家人 所以这次 我都很少跟朋友出去了
因为有些朋友，可有可无
太多朋友，心深不可测
我累了，累了要一个个应付了
你们会觉得好笑，才个20出头 就累了？以后怎么出社会？
那就让我休息陪家人先吧
妈咪之前都很多次，我答应要带她去走街 结果临时改跟朋友出去
妈咪嘴里说没关系 但眼神却透露出了她的失望
一次，两次，三次...几次了
我有天晚上，我为某个事情哭了 累的流泪了
忘了锁门，妈咪进来看见了 我嘴硬说是眼睛进沙 死不肯承认说我哭了
妈咪二话不说 把我抱在怀里
在这种时刻 那么需要被安慰的时候 却得到了母亲最温暖的拥抱
我眼泪哗啦哗啦得流个不停 妈咪笑我是老baby 那么大了还哭
我告诉老天，我什么都可以不要
只求家人平安

从上次和他最严重的一次冷战后 我冷静的思考 我什么应该做 什么不应该做
刚好要带妈咪出街 我自动帮妈咪化妆
她嘴里说我发癫，其实早就准备让我化了
我帮妈咪化了好美，眼线 睫毛 眉毛 粉底 腮红 样样都齐全 都做得美美
我记得我当时看了妈咪，我觉得 我妈咪好漂亮
爸爸看见妈咪了 也愣住了3秒 就笑眯眯 说漂亮
我妈咪当时的笑容，是满足的 是幸福的 是快乐的
我不知道为何 我就因为她满足的笑容 我流了感动的眼泪
之后我们走街都手勾手 什么话都谈
什么笑话都一直笑
我勾起妈咪的尾指说 我现在没钱，以后一定赚多多钱给你
也因为知道妈咪担心我学业 所以我目前
半工半读，是很辛苦 但我愿意

前几天 还因为操劳过度 我差点晕倒在店里
我有贫血 但没那么严重过 去看了医生 才知道我发烧了
我没试过那么拼命 因为我想新年买一件衣给妈咪和爹地
所以，大致上星期一到星期天我都在做工
当然，半夜的时间就留给读书时间
妈咪开始阻止我去做工，怕我累坏
我很懒惰，有得坐就坐，有得睡就睡 但是工作起来 我就是癫
之前找到一份工，因为不受到尊重 妈咪说我们有得是骨气 要有志气
少了那一点钱没关系 至少不要让别人看不起你 所以，我都听妈咪的
都找到了很多新工作 很多公司邀请我去上班
感恩上天的安排，感谢处处都是贵人
有时像放弃读书的念头，但是他我男朋友都在一直鼓励我 支持我 给我安慰
在我最低潮时给我最大的安慰
谢谢他一直以来的包容 虽然会超级 会斗争 会冷战 会气话
但这都没办法改变 他在我心中的价值 他的无私 他的指导
让我再次不管在哪方面 都有了动力 把压力变成动力

爸爸赚钱辛苦，我不敢拿他的钱 也不让他知道我半工半读 更不让他知道我健康亮了红灯
因为爸爸也是这样熬过来的，为何我不可以？
我是女生，身体弱 但我可以照顾自己
他给我没星期的零用钱，我都收起来不花 因为他生日也快到啦
家里我最小，哥哥姐姐做工 但爸爸还要供我读书
所以，我打算毕业后 先找份好的工作 赚钱给他们
好让可以给爸爸每个月的钱和给妈咪钱去买她喜欢的东西

很多人不解，说我有钱人的女儿 千金大小姐 做什么工?
我家庭是小康之家 更不是什么千金 我是靠自己努力回来的
东西都是我自己买回来的
他们说我的衣永远不会重复 那是因为旧衣我拿来卖二手
就有钱买新衣啦 就这么简单
我因为是家里最小 所以不可以让爸爸妈咪操心
不否认，曾经的叛逆让我明白如今我更需要成熟些不让他们担心
所以 我多么的累 初一十五我念经
我特地去写了佛经 爸爸看了好开心
努力读书 quiz 差一分就满分
妈咪要买什么，我会赚钱买给她 少买自己的了
妈咪要去学什么 我带她去学
妈咪要看什么戏 我买给她看
她喜欢穿什么衣 看中了我私低下偷偷买给她
我每一天惯例 一天一次“我爱你” 肉麻得很 但我真的爱她
妈咪因为曾经是裁缝师，所以特别喜欢看美美的衣 美美的布 我都带她去看
今天还买了4片布要拿去订做自己的衣 她，笑得很开心
我发烧也带她去看，因为她的笑容 真的是无可取代

话说回来，最近不知道为什么 呼吸困难 老是头晕晕
我看，是我老了 我担心我病倒了 没人照顾妈咪
所以 我都不允许自己病倒
医生说我缺氧，怎么？杨丞琳上身哦？╮(╯▽╰)╭

要学会珍惜爸爸妈妈 珍惜身边人
一生人 就有这么一次机会做亲人
来世 都不知道还有没有机会
爸爸妈妈想要的 就是看我们成功 乖乖
他们要的并不多 就是我们健健康康的快乐成长
所以 我开始都是报喜不报忧
多顺他们的意就好了
不必在乎是否是有钱人 因为钱买不到亲情
如果你有个爱你的爸爸妈妈
请你珍惜 还有多让他们开心
他们为我们付出了很多
也是时候要我们付出一些来回报

不是名牌 不是名车
而是给予他们陪伴 谅解 快乐 和健康
这，就是最好的回报


我喜欢名牌 喜欢钱 喜欢化妆品 喜欢美丽 d
但没有我父母 就不会有这些
如果我不孝敬父母 我更不配拥有这些
万事以孝为先
所以孝顺不能等

赶快去给父母一个电话或拥抱吧
我已经给了无数次 他们都嫌我烦 虽然笑嘻嘻
我爱我父母
我希望 我能给他们更多更好的生活
因为，我珍惜

回来了 :)

两个白痴在发癫。哈哈
不管怎样还是爱你爱你 :)

好久没写部落格了
更新下最近的状态
每天都是半夜睡觉，下去起床
我很快就没命了 T.T

那天和Albee去了jonker,wohhowww.


矮矮的我，很可爱下！哈哈哈哈哈哈哈（不要脸）


这个女人，我正要给钱， 就突然要拍照 害我措手不及 不懂什么鬼pose,哈哈哈

我喜欢着风格 <3 p="p">

感谢法师从中国寄来的，这是我的！感恩~


最近过得啊，马马虎虎的...
缺钱，真的很严重缺钱 所以很努力赚钱...
最近也陪家人的时间比较多，爸爸妈妈都比较开心了
多点笑嘛，最多我每天做小丑 /.\
哥哥也回来了，笑话特别多...
最近看了youtube video各种笑话
我时不时都一直笑笑笑，时间也因为我一直笑所以过得特别快
没道理？我也知道~笑着开心没什么不好
至少啊~我知道happy go lucky的道理
我需要lucky,所以我在开路让它进来我世界
乐观吧？:)
没钱？没关系，是时候用我生锈已久的头脑了
动一动脑筋，对身体好。:)
才发现原来买了蛮多衣服，不过同时也买了我半橱的衣服
所以，我是用我卖了旧衣的钱来买新衣
当然还有一些其他自己赚的哟！aja aja fighting
最近因为笑容多了，乐观多了
很多事没想象的那样糟了！这是我开心的一点
因为我知道啊，我很会胡思乱想，有点神经质吗？或许吧  女生都这样 敏感敏感的 :(
但我尽量改了哦！
除了一直hehe haha,我都没想太多了...
因为我浪费太多时间在想东想西了...
没意义对吧？的确...

家人感情升温，男朋友感情更是每天欺负来欺负去
之前和男朋友感情，有一阵子真的是跌到谷里
好糟糕的，平时都是任性的我 突然连续几天都很冷静...
连续几天我都不联络他，也不见面
我就当做是...让彼此冷静下来的一个空间
安静的，看戏，听歌，做自己喜欢做的事，出去走走散步
主要是，倾听自己的声音...自己的心...
不想冲动做错任何事或任何决定
不想冲动说出气话
果然真的，几天后我们卸下任何一切，坦白面对...
事情就这样有了好转
也更了解我们彼此需要的是什么
吵架次数少很多，每天都是疯疯颠颠
一起在shopping mall里面，突然跳舞
一起大喊大叫
我看，很少人能加入我们，因为每个人会觉得没面子
但我就“理别人那么多，我爽，我开心就好” ...
我们要一一直这样sampat下去ok?
提往事的人，请北盏！deal!
<3 p="p">
和家人的，好很多，每天开开心心的
我妈咪最近特别开心是我最近吃得特别多
妈呀 不是开玩笑的 超级快饿
我怀疑我是不是二度发育-.-"
如果是，让我长高些好吗？( ⊙o⊙ )
【拜托..】

和朋友的感情，嗯，不错吧？
朋友来了，去了，散了
都不知道该怎么形容了
现在学会安静的享受拥有独自空间的奇妙
说寂寞？也还好，很自由
认识了新朋友，miyo.班上同学
她也是经常一个人。
我们说话超有默契!
她曾经一个人就这样去台湾背包旅行！天啊，给点掌声好吗？
太勇敢了吧？！还是我老了啊？我没这个勇气耶！T.T
我也喜欢旅行，我喜欢做饼干，刚好她妈妈是开饼干店（类似）的，我好期待跟她妈妈学习
哈哈。本来华文学会的人，找我做-资料组副组长，但我没经验 怕搞坏他们的作品
所以，让位了。都没想到接手的人竟然是她！哈哈
好巧耶！就这样那天聊了好多，好开心 :)
有默契，投契，难得呢
她不多话，但我们就聊得很起劲，她话也多了
上次还得谢谢她帮忙我add subject因为我刚好人在外，谢谢你哟 :)
我会报答你的 嘻嘻

和其他朋友，
不错呀，都有联络 <3 p="p">大家都是我好朋友，谁对我好，我就对谁好
但，我不乱相信人
友情，给了我太多次失望 所以还是走一步看一步算
不敢太大期望 我不喜欢失望
但就这样，心也就不那么累
凡事都看得很开

我记得那天打电话给我生活里出现的第一个李大仁
他的条件和李大仁都很接近
我问了他，如何学会看开？
他说，凡事都拿捏得均匀些，找到平衡点 这样就不会失去平衡
虽然他洛里啰嗦说了好多，但我领悟了是这个
现在遇到的都是小事，等遇到了失去了最亲的人才是心痛
我明白了些道理，凡事都珍惜
所以我好久都没有惹爸爸妈妈生气了，虽然有时他们突然抓kick发脾气
哈哈，就像上面所说，乐观点
一笑置之，没什么的 :)
开心就好
李大仁，谢谢你啊 :)



这个学期，希望可以拿好成绩 所以，开始准备读书了
太快？并不，因为头脑转得慢 所以 我需要慢慢来 哈哈

简单的生活就这样，快毕业了
毕业后，我还打算去工作...
去哪 就不说了 :)
秘密，嘻嘻