some random post

Yes , long time no see. I couldn't believe my eyes when i saw the date of my last post, it was like freaking long time ago. It was half year back. Time flies.

I've change my whole blog look,into something really simple and plain.
When you get older,you started to prefer something simple
Simple = nice.

Well as usual,it is a midnight post,again.

This recent,i've been struggling with my dilemma-ness .

If there's only one option for you to go either for your dream,or reality. Which one would you choose?

This recent,i feel so unproductive. It's like a tiring daily routine for me.not to say tiring of working but literally wasting time. Which is a sad thing.

After since semester break,i've done nothing . Jobless.

Nothing/no one motivates me,ohh nooo. I couldn't stand this kind of life style any longer.

So,how should i start here?

my recent look ,hair grow longer,different make up look ,slightly different style.

How's my current hair style?Many of my friend loves it,i guess mostly probably is just because of the length.

Girls being girls

Back to previously,I used to be so envy of those my friend who has long pretty shinny hair.

Now ,things have changed. I'm sick of my long hair,i decided to shorten the length.

Haven't really decided what kind of hair style but definitely gonna go for a hair cut soon.

And of course,new hair color to replace this sucky current hair color,it's actually faded one,well i guess everyone can tell .

Speaking about hair length,wondering what hair length should i go for?erm....shorter ....shoulder length?

Gahhhh, i miss this lady.In case you don't know,she's my best friend in Inti .

KIMBERLEY 

How we met each other?ah hah! Thanks to the orientation before the class starts.

We were in the same group but weren't that close at first,eventually getting closer and closer after few outings and guess what,we're like the best buddy ever!

We understand and know each other so well,it feels like we've known each other for years ,ain't kidding.

Because we "click" so much,like she said,sometimes it's too much haha. 

Her smile,i love that charming smile.She loves to laugh,and literally just laugh everywhere or any lame jokes.

It's a good thing thou,she always make me smile :)

Even thou she's 19 and i'm....errrrr 22 *gosh i feel so old saying this out but ..nahhhh who cares*

The problem i have in campus is,huge gap between those kiddo .

best way to describe would be ,i couldn't "click" with them.

That explains why i'm always alone ,but i love being alone so that's not a big deal.

Fortunately, i still have her this silly girl in campus ,and she's like the sweetest girl ever,very very supportive *thumbs up*.

Oh my hair,you grow very fast and also very dry T3T

Didn't have the time to update how i celebrated my bday this year,It was a very simple yet memorable one.

I went to Zouk ,yes it is my first time .

And of course ,with my favorite twin sista ,Mandy the pretty <3 nbsp="">

Went to my cousin's wedding dinner last week @ Ramada hotel.

That's me,my lovely grandma and my sexy mum.

Notice something similar?curly hair with different hair length .LOL

Another selfie taken in the car,sorry it's really blur because it was pretty late and the lighting wasn't that good.

:(

Typical #OOTD picture.

My make up routine.

foundation , concealer , brows , eye shadow , eye liner , and mascara.

but recently,i'm facing a problem .I look awfully pale without lipstick .

so i don't know since when and how,lipstick has already became my most important essential for day out.

Reddish tone color suits me better,i can't stand myself with pink,i feel uncomfortable.

maybe that explains why,i'm not lady enough.

See those scare eyebags , i didn't get enough sleep :(

And i need to find something to do,not work but at least,something to fill my time.

I feel very unproductive and dead,i don't like seeing myself like this

I can't remember when was the last time i really spend time for myself

Sounds pathetic?ngehhh. 

That is why,i need a change from now.

I'm tired ,even not doing anything .still feeling tired. I feel so old so useless.ohhh boyyyy

People tend to get negative when emotion is down. Sigh .

I miss the time when i woke up everyday,i feel very fresh 

And i need a huge massive change for my wardrobe ,i need to change my style.

Everyday i wake up around 1-3pm ,and sleep at 3-5am.

It's not a healthy life style obviously ,and i can't recall when was the last time i went for a jog.OH MY GOD

time flies,which make me so frustrated .Sometimes i think of my age,i feel like shit

I'm 22 1/2 now. Shiet. I feel so old,i'm ageing.

is it a sign that i have to start using anti-ageing product? Oh my god,please kill me.

I've read a blog,the blogger said we have to embrace aging,don't be afraid of growing up.

The older you get,the wiser you are, so why should you be sad getting wiser.

True. and guess what,i have a love-hate relationship with my chubby cheeks.

They make me look fat in picture but look younger at the same time. So.... yea.... no idea.

I wish i'm taller

longer legs

fairer flawless skin

smaller slimmer face

I would be very grateful and thankful but ,we always want more. no one will ever satisfy with themselves.

Human = never satisfy.

Keep hitting replay this song,uncountable,more than hundred times.

Pretty sure most of the girls LOVE this korean drama, i'm not a big fans of any kind of drama.

I seldom watch it. But i couldn't help it after how my friend recommended me this drama,it just constantly appearing in my mind after they kept singing this song and yes,i finally choose to go for it,

The last korean drama i watched was few years back.

Honestly this drama didn't really make me touch.

Only the last few episode ,that alien guy left. and i started to cry because seeing that girl so heart broken.LOL

But the most attracting part for me is,that girl's character totally like me.

Scream and shout everywhere.That's how i conclude this drama. *facepalm*

Anyhow, i need to start a new life.SOON. ASAP.

Odd timing

I got nowhere express out my feelings and no one to talk to,so i probably just write it down here.

Life, how would you describe your life? 

For some people,they might say "it's hard " 

Yeah,life is a bitch . It never been easy. Not for me,not for you,not for everyone.

Some people might say "it's challenging" .Yeah. this sounds better. I mean life can be hard,but it depends on how you actually see it.

At some point in our lives,you might experience people trying to bring you down.

People who are discouraging.

People who are pulling down your esteem.

Those people who are NEGATIVE.

At other points in life,there would be rough patches

A certain period of life where everything seems to be in a mess and nothing is going smoothly.

This ,happened all the time in our lives. Consider as part of our lives

Everyone would experience this before.

The only difference is,the way that the thing is being handled.

They are certain people,who will choose to complain.

It's okay to complain sometimes,but some people they're just complaining everyday about everything.

Just because they can't take the pressure,so they release it out by complaining non-stop.

Awkward to say that i'm actually one of those,once.

But i realize there's a minor changes ,i don't know since when it all started,i don't really complain that much anymore.

I mean yes i still do,but i'm cutting down on it,doing this. Because it's annoying.

I treat myself an ice-cream or any desserts will do ,to stop myself from complaining,and it literally just makes me so much feel better after that. 

As i mentioned,rough patches.

Isn't it normal to have difficulties and challenges in life?

If life was nothing but a smooth ride,don't you think it's kinda boring?

Yeah,IT IS.

Challenges make us stronger.

We learnt and developed ,it's a part of growing.

Whenever i face some difficulties,i try comforting myself,it's just a homework

A homework to test my patience,my rationality.

Whenever i'd think of this way,i would take it as a challenge and i shall not fail it.Or else,i'm just failing myself.

So this lately,i don't know about you guys,but it's been a pretty tough month for me.

Owh,should say this 2 months.

Everything seems like ,it all messed up.

I got into car accident ,and it happened this evening when i'm on my back from work.

It's my fault,obviously.

I didn't fully focus when i was driving,and accidentally kissed that car's backside.

it's seriously my first time having such terrible car accident.but thank god i'm okay.

No physical injuries .

But that car,serious crash from the back.

I felt extremely guilty,and still feeling super guilty now!

And so many things happened ,but i don't wish to write everything down here

it would be super long post if i do that but

let's make it short and simple.

Everything didn't really go the way i wanted or i expected. Didn't went well.

It's really hard,and i had no idea what to do.

I quit studying in MMU,needless to explain the reason why.

So currently i'm working. I want to earn more money in order to make my dream come true.

That's the thing I realize.

There's a saying,if u wish upon the stars every night before you sleep ,for what u want ,it'll come true if u do that constantly.

I know it sounds pretty funny,but i actually did that .LOL . Don't judge me.

But,as time goes by,i realize if you don't work hard,no matter how hard you pray every night,god damn thing just won't come true.

Reality just gave me a tight slap,to wake me up.And so,i started to find a way how.

And the answer is simple,earn your own living. 

My dream ,current one is ...i wish to go U.S 

Yes,to United States.

But not really sure will it come true,so i'd work harder and earn more.Make my first move.

I don't want to share how hard i work.because everyone is working so hard for the same reason.
And that's why i have something left to spend now.And i have a life to sustain.

Whenever the salary is released, the first thing come into my mind is - my family.
I'd buy things especially for my parents or probably treat them a nice dinner.
I'm the youngest ,i know people might thought that i'm the most spoiled child . Can't give u a specific answer.
Because i crave to be super independent girl since i was a kid. I want and i have to.

Then the next i would think of probably will be the one i love.
I spent so much,freaking much just because i want to put that smile on.

My life does seem easy,not "glam" life style but it seems i could get whatever i want.
I don't get all these by flicking fingers ,i had my hard times ,i climbed my way up.
Because things i want in life,i need to archive it by work hard.
So hopefully, my dream will come true.


Life seems so hard for me this recent
Will it continue be like this?Gosh.
Argument non- stop
endless misunderstanding

I wish someone can be here for me,nothing.Just give me warm hug will do.
Well yeah,i'm hugging myself tonight.

But no matter how tough is the journey ,just remember life's a climb but the view is great.
Don't give up.
But I'm so tired....
I'm exhausted

I guess, i need some rest 

And asking myself, should i go on?or let go?

好久不见

好久不见 我都快忘记了我其实有blog的存在 

大家都好吗？我很懒惰更新我的blog了 因为最近实在是太忙了

我都懒得用英文来写 因为头脑没有空间来translate了 哈哈 （借口啦 懒惰就有）

有好几个月没更新了

来写我最近的生活 嗯，算起来 很不错 

前一阵子 有颓废了几个星期 我这个人不喜欢过那样的生活

but 那时就是control不到自己的emotion 

因为 真的很难很难很难去完全控制自己的情绪 

不过因为朋友的支持 我总算还是 渡过来了 

难关 人生还是需要面对 但看你是选择笑着乐观去面对 当做是人生中老天给你的考验来破自己的记录 

还是选择整天怨天尤人 

我是前者 不否认，我是悲观的人 但我需要改变自己，需要改观

因为 性格改变命运

而且很坚信law of attraction 的道理

好吧，回来正题 我最近开始交一些比较特别的朋友 他们带给我生活上的影响很大

并不是什么特别的影响 只是我对人生的看法 因为他们而改变

我开始交一些年纪比较大的朋友 开始接触不同年龄层的朋友

才发觉 原来很大事情我还需要跟他们学习 所以现在的生活都开始学着去享受

不需要太多朋友 几个值得你去交的 就好 :)

开始去找马六甲很多很棒很有特色的店找食物吃 

感觉真的很棒哟 :)

忘了提 前阵子，我就临时突然想去周杰伦 演唱会，就和哥哥一起买了票

本来以为想说 讲爽就算了，没想到这次我们真的买了 

那演唱会真的很棒 很好看，虽然我对周杰伦的歌 不是很熟 但很享受那个环境的兴奋

我一直都喜欢会乐器的男生 很有魅力 很吸引我 <3 nbsp="" p="">

我老公在台上为我表演 哈哈哈哈哈哈哈

嗯，那几天都在KL，但没什么逛街 因为很远 懒惰去

也顺便提 我们之前为二哥庆祝生日 姐姐还做了很好吃的cup cake ,orange flavor 

那天为哥哥庆祝生日的同时 就是我脚受伤的时候

也没什么，就脚穿高跟鞋 扭到了 -.-"

之后就这样 没想到会这么严重需要包成这样 不过还蛮痛的那个时候

走路都成问题

但现在都好很多~\(≧▽≦)/~啦啦啦

今年不知道为什么 感触特别多 像是开始觉得 自己老了 真的，老了

像是从，我参加我朋友的结婚典礼 我突然发现 周围的朋友有些都开始做爸爸妈妈了

我们的年纪 是时候要真正的settle down了 

*也顺便祝我朋友 和他老婆 永浴爱河 恩恩爱爱 :)

也或许因为 我上了degree后 开始就是 新朋友，都是18-20岁的

显得我就是最老的那个 是姐姐的身份了 oh my god 

但我都告诉他们我18岁 哈哈哈哈 

我小只看不出 没关系啦 我开心就好

也因为这样，我发觉我做很多事情 都不能再像以前那样 任性，那样无理

要学会顾虑到别人 顾虑到结果 任何事情不能再冲动 

任何事也不能再草率结束 不管任何决定都是这样

要学会比以前成熟 虽然很多人都喜欢活在过去，拿过去来批评 不过已经没关系了

因为我眼里现在 除了家人 值得交的朋友 还有自己的未来 ，没有别的了

也因为这样 我开始不再喜欢去clubbing了 虽然我本来就不常去

现在都去lounge bar，也不再过小孩子的生活了...

提到朋友，前几个星期和我中学的好朋友聚会 很难得大家都得空

 

嘉良，yetta,abby,我和thomas

我们从以前都非常要好 到现在都还在保持联络 希望我们的感情都能一直这样维持下去

和他们在一起的时候 没有压力 没有烦恼 也很开心

所以我真的很珍惜这段友情，希望我们能一直这样保持下去 :)

那位漂亮的yetta，她离开马来西亚去台湾继续求学了

很舍不得她去，最近都太忙了学校的东西不然我还想和她gathering最后一次 :(

没关系，我答应她会去台湾找她 可能会跟嘉良他们一起吧 呵呵

娴，你在台湾要照顾自己okay?要努力读书 顺便找个男朋友在那里吧！哈哈

我祝福你 :) 希望你一切顺利 有个你人生中美好的回忆，开开心心的 <3 p="">

加油哦 

提到这个，刚好我有件好事要跟大家宣布 那就是 我。毕业。啦！

谢谢家人都特地来参加我毕业典礼 感动 :)

我其实本来没有想在mmu就读diploma,就误打误撞的情况下报名的 无言哈哈

但是因为这个意外的缘分 我才会认识了这么多 这么棒的朋友

陪我一起渡过了这些日子 真的非常难忘 非常感激 感动 和感恩

因为有了他们 我的读书生涯才会过得如此精彩 如此的让人难以忘怀

你没办法想象 我见到他们的时候 那种心情 是多么的激动

欢笑声不断 

谢谢你们为我人生画上了很色彩的一幅画 让我生日不再单调乏味

也因为就读这里 我认识了我几个好朋友 好兄弟 哈哈 

Frank chua and sylvester .好朋友 :)

那天在KL 也和他们还有philip and chris 

5个人在setiawalk 的 beer factory做很多很白痴很搞笑的事情 

我好久好久都没这样开怀大笑了 不需要顾形象的就这样笑 放肆的笑

因为知道很难得的机会 所以那一次的聚会我都很珍惜和他们相处的机会

也很谢谢你们带给我的欢乐和你们最擅长的搞笑 哈哈

我因为和他们聚在一起后 才发现原来我最近的生活如此的沉闷 很没意思

超想念以前和他们一起上课 一起搞event的日子 

也因为见到他们 我的energy又回来了 \(^o^)/~

话说回来 我那天才结束我法语的drama表演 

和她们一组 还有两个男生 哈哈，也很开心跟他们合作 很可爱的wendy小姐，漂亮能干的alicia还有那两个双胞胎room mate哈哈 

希望也能继续保持联络 <3 p="">

今天还和这位漂亮的may reen小姐玩了一整天 

先去吃午餐，然后去打保龄球，然后射箭，晚餐吃意大利餐后再去casa del rio喝酒聊天

她姐姐也来 也叫了好多朋友 大家都聊得很开心

她是我最近才认识不久的朋友 性格跟我很像

因为很sampat 哈哈哈哈 很开心认识她啦

她是位美容师，服务一流 迟一点那我也需要她来救我的脸了 LOL

前几天是妈咪的生日 8.28

妈咪，再一次生日快乐

对不起我还没能力买什么给你 但我会尽力多陪你 多带你去走走

我知道我做得不够好，但我想告诉你 我很骄傲有你一个这么棒的妈咪

你几乎完美 很多东西我还真的需要向你学习

过去我叛逆的时期对你不是很好，都很叛逆，一直让你操心，希望现在能借这个机会弥补我过去的过错

嗯，不应该说这个机会，我从前年开始都答应我自己 不再跟那你顶嘴

虽然偶尔的争斗是难免 但是我会多让让你 ，果然啊，我们的感情比以前好多了

希望能一直这样很好的下去 我要带你弄美美，去happy happy

要去哪里都是我来开车 你乖乖享受就好了

我能做的就是这些基本的开始，迟一点赚钱了 我都会给你更好的 <3 p="">

迟一点会和妈咪一起做很多东西 ，要一起实行

等完成了 再跟大家公布蛤 O(∩_∩)O~

嗯，都写得差不多了吧 就报告生活这样简单

最近都很早睡 除了今天，因为赶着功课 不然都是12点多就睡觉了

最近爱上看书，在读书“爱自己”这本书 还没看完 ，我推荐这本书给大家，尤其是女生

因为爱自己，真的很重要，很棒很棒的一本书 ，值得购买 

最近都爱睡觉前听法语歌 放松心情

最近开始爱听90's music

最近我体会到 你不爱自己，没有人会爱你

最近开始学着很多事情，不要轻言放弃

最近开始明白，很多时候 话少说一点 比较好 因为祸从口出

最近过得很好，努力迈向做个坚强的女人

最近也终于明白 很多时候 睁一只眼闭一只眼去看待很多事 在人生中 是很需要的

还有很多时候 执着 可以的话 不要那么的执着

爱自己，做个有自信的女生

能屈能伸

遇到难题就解决 伤心难过几天就好

不要永远原地踏步

不要怨天尤人

靠人不如靠己

就开始从自己 改变自己

:)

新的一个月 新的开始

希望一切会比从前更好

P/S : 最近实在是太忙了 感觉很充实 开心 \(^o^)/~

SQUARE

It's finally school reopen,hell yeah babeh.It's tomorrow
I can't wait to be a student again.
Well incase you don't know,i'm taking bachelor in marketing.
Hopefully everything is gonna be smooth
and let's make it as a good start.

Tomorrow class will be at 8am so i gotta get up at 6am to get ready for school.
But i can't sleep now.
mixed feeling ,couldn't find out the reason why

ugh,some kinda emo-ness just struck me.
Gosh

I feel so tired ,i want hugs
So i hug my one and only weird teddy bear every night before i sleep.
I want to be strong
But superwomen gets tired sometime
It's okay ,but i won't give up,I'll face every problem in my life with my smile.



Celebrated father's day,and my dad was really happy...but too bad he wasn't feeling well.
recover speedy dad!
Love you <3 p="">

Gonna sleep d,force myself to sleep.
People are complicated,trust no one but yourself.
yeah.

嗨，你好 :)

头发要快快长呀 :)

最近生活变得很多，变得很不像我原有的

但却意外的发现，其实这样过也不错

很自在 很悠闲 

最近脾气被我训练出来 变得没那么暴躁了

虽然感觉周遭的事事都在针对我

但 我尽量都很淡定的去面对

那天姐姐问起一些事 并且告诉了我

很多朋友，都只是你人生旅途的一个过客

有些早上巴士 有些迟上巴士

但 有哪些是真正愿意陪你走完整个旅途的

只有你自己以后才知道

所以所有的一切发生 我都一笑置之

不发生 都发生了

就像你对别人好，别人未必感激

或你珍惜的东西 别人未必同样的珍惜

大家只不过是不一样的看法

而且

期待越高 失望越大

失望是难免的，但我已经把那种感觉减到最低 最低 最低

或许看得多了，心情比较没那么复杂和纠结

没了就算了 没什么大不了 :)

我的日子还是照过 还是开心的笑

只是在一个小事情 都可以有这样大的变化

见证了感情上的脆弱 是多么的经不起考验

谁对谁错 无所谓了

我不想再理了

理身边爱我的人，就够了

姐姐也说，要找个能互相扶持 成长的朋友

这样才会变得更好 :) 嗯嗯 有道理

突然好多旧朋友找回我聊聊 好想念以前T.T

朋友们等等我，我们还没有outing！:D

说说最近的生活，我迟一些会成为braces girl,钢牙妹

我今天去拔了两颗牙，医生选了中午的时间

就是血液循环最旺盛的时候来拔

我流的血真的不用本的，半个小时没有停止

算是我今天第2个最有挑战性的项目，嘴里打麻痹针

平时我不怕打针，但嘴里的嘛.........就有点 ~~(╯﹏╰)难以形容的心情

我今天在右边拔了上下两颗牙，医生给我打了4针（或许是这样算吧，因为里外各边一次）

那个针，不是开玩笑的刺激，因为比平时的针来的大

我当时的想法就是：妈呀，没有XS size的么？！

但是前3针，都没什么疼 （我不怕打针疼，嘿嘿）

但是最后一针，就是上左边的，痛得我不小心叫了一声。

因为，这次真的痛。

打了针，我慢慢感觉我嘴巴都开始没感觉了...

那种感觉很奇妙，感觉像半边脸中风 哈哈哈哈！

因为麻痹的真的是...完全没感觉(⊙o⊙)

医生用尖尖的用具来弄我牙龈，真的没感觉

嘴唇也是 oh no...

是时候开始拔了。

整个拔牙的过程，我只能说像摇头比赛

因为医生会用一个夹子夹你那颗牙，然后拼了命摇啊~摇啊~很努力的拔

当然，你麻痹了你没觉得痛

但，你还能感觉稍微的压力

当两颗都拔了后，你就是名副其实的bogeh了...

就连我漱口，嘴巴明明是关的，但是水还是会不小心流出来

而且是血腥画面...都是你的血...

拿了棉花垫着那bogeh的地方止血，这时候麻醉药还没退

你不能说话，我当时的感觉 像智障那样 因为不能说话 嘴巴没感觉

说了话会流口水 很恶心我知道-.-（分享心情嘛 哈哈哈哈 不要嫌弃）

之后妈咪说带我去吃我最爱吃的芒果丸子【听了整个心情就是飞！！】

我以为吃了些冰的 会好一些...

血是有少了，但同时麻醉药退了 我开始feel到那个痛了

kick来了...开始头痛了

而且只痛右边（因为我拔右边嘛）>////<

又痛，讲话又像智障，又很累，不够睡

整个心情就是乱啦 (+﹏+)~

夸张的是 我去吃那个芒果丸子的时候

我咬到了自己的嘴唇都不知道 

糟糕...

现在需要靠止痛药 才能好好睡

绑牙原来是这么辛苦的，但为了漂亮 这点不算什么了...

我要变得更好 我说到做到！

就这样，结束 :)

还有，我找到了我幸福 <3 p="">

Human

I don't understand people.

I don't.

Get up

was using my Iphone5 front camera to take this picha,not bed eh.ney ney

(Ignore my grammer mistake thank you)

With my favorite songs from MMOTHS ( as i probably know that most of you don't know who is this,it's a DJ,i love his music,so inspiration and it is the first time i could listen to some music,i could feel my soul deep inside there)

Got some inspiration to blog about something about my life,recently.

My life has totally changed,since when?hmmm let me recall back.

Since last year?Since past few months?

Actually i can't really ensure when was it,because people do change ,tiny ...little by little

Until the day when you looked back all the memories,the path

then only when you're realize how fragile human is

I can't really specific about based on my changes,but i'm pretty much sure that

I'm no longer the small little girl.

Yes,celebrated my 21st birthday with family and friends 

The reason why i choose to go Kuala Lumpur to have my birthday celebration

As if it could be the most memorable birthday celebration ever.

Unfortunately ,it wasn't.

It was the worst birthday i ever had,the exact same day.

Something just happened so unexpected .

Since i was a kid,in many ways ,i always felt that i'm a transparent to others.

I felt so inferior and unspecial.

I've always felt that way.

So it leads to when comes to my birthday ,i don't really had a real birthday celebration like having a GREAT party session,i just received the wishes from everyone and that's it.

I used to care how people think about me.

Seriously,it feels sucks.That you have to try and guess ,wondering what's on their mind.The worst feeling ever

And that is how i became a sensitive girl .

Because i'm the transparent,so it's like i need to put a lot more effort to get myself noticed.

But don't get me wrong,my parents treat me very well.very loving and caring.

And this is when,since childhood time

I feel nothing when it comes to my birthday , supposedly It should be a big day!

Wonderful,memorable,sweet,exciting,amazing,etc....whatever words could describe for birthday

But,i found out that,every single year, i celebrated it with my family.

We would have our simple dinner ,a small birthday cake with a birthday song.

I found out this is how i normally celebrate my birthday ,and after years and years

I'm already get used to it.

Birthday seems not really that exciting for me anymore.

Even there's few years,i could remember vividly

I count down my birthday ,alone myself in the kitchen

I took out one of the fererrocher chocolate,and put one candle on top of it

Sing birthday song for myself ,make a wish ,candle blowing ,opened up the chocolate and finish it.

My thought of that time was ,i think it is totally fine with me,it may sound weird for you guys but

this is it :)

I always being left out by others,it came worse when i was in secondary school life.

I always prefer EVEN number than ODD number

Because when it comes to odd number,they will be the partner and getting into pairs,i'm always the odd one out.

Or maybe,i'm too invincible  (WAS)

which was why i feel comfort when there's the time i'm with my boyfriend (WAS)

At least,i'm having a partner :)

Am from a very strict family,i'm the youngest.

my brothers and sister are, so introvert and quite ,and i found out i could not let things continue like this.

I want a happy family so i be the clown .

Until now i'm 21,i'm still the clown.

I'm happy doing that,because i could see the changes.

at least,it bring happiness to my family :)

So in house.i'm a clown

With best friends,i'm the craziest

When i get back to my room...Oh my...It's finally the real me...

Take out my iphone or Ipod ,listening to some musics

Take out some books and read

You might surprised that,Stephanie is reading books?!

Yes :) don't know since when,i just feel like i need to change

When i no idea where to start from,i just start from the most basic one 

I bought some english novel when i was in KL,my birthday :)

[[28/2,woke up early in the morning

Having brunch with mom and dad

After brunch,we went book store and i came across with some novels 

Then i suddenly remember there's a friend of mine,very good in english

He told me once that his mom force him to study when he was a kid

but he fell in love with studying novels after few years later.

Well,i was thinking that...maybe i should give myself a try too...

Then after done shopping,went dinner with friend as well.

It was so damn simple but i love it.]]

Ah,not forgot to mention that i'm officially complete my diploma ,not to say graduate haha.
And so this is the stage that i'm wondering
which path should i choose?
working or further study?Well i think i will choose study.
After  complete all my studies then only i be the full time workaholic .

NOW**
-Now i'm already 21,i don't need a partner , because i realize that there's no one you can really trust or rely one.So be independent.
-And now i finally know that some specific situation friendship is more important than relationship
Friends for life,but lover will break up someday,somehow.
-I'm no longer afraid of how people think about me,because my happiness based on doing the things i like.
-I'm no longer afraid of ODD numbers,because in life there are something are not only meant to be understood it,but to be accepted.
-And still,there are no excitement when comes to my birthday haha!But i personally love Christmas so much.
-Now i'm already get used to it with my life,i love doing things alone...
Watch movie alone,shopping alone,drive my car here and there alone.Most importantly is,stay in my room alone and rest.

most important is
-I gotta be strrong!!!!!!!

And i've list down that the things i wanna achieve.So everything starts from a planning.

Somehow i realize one thing,if i have RM5000 with me ,how would i plan to send that money?
If previously,i can 100% confirm that will buy those branded stuff
BUT NOW,i rather go for a long vacation,instead of LV.
Explore this beautiful world 


Last but not least, i want to thanks those people who bought me present
Thank you guys so much,appreciate <3 p="">Althou my 21st birthday is not that amazing enough but
thanks to Albee my bestie ,damn she successfully shed my tears .


Went dinner together and suddenly came out with this 4 little small cakes.Awww how adorable <3 p="">Thank you <3 p="">You made my life more even colorful than ever.

Ok,so now here is some random photos.

*Work so hard to slim down my face man.*


*No kidding,my very first La Senza*

The early birthday celebration with family :)








 

That's all :)

Good night look LOL


P/S : my health problem is reaching red light already i guess
I can't breathe when i'm sleeping.
and my gastric became more even serious after food poisoning

FML

19/1/2013

LOOL,finally it's my first 2013 post
Sorry to be say that this post ain't gonna be a long or proper post
I was just wondering how long have i neglected my blog?
Surprisingly,it has been 1 month i never touch my bloggie
I can't imagine that,seriously
I was quite addicted to blog,blogging all the while
Blogging was my first priority since i was Form 4?
Then it turns to red light after i completed my last semester
To be frank,i only took 2 subjects this semester
It sounds like it should be very free and goyang kaki all the while ,i know -.-"
But i ended up with busying working working and working
I can't believe that i'm in love with being a workaholic
Same goes to be a shopaholic ,just a different job scope :)
One is to earn,one is to spend
Luckily im training myself a habit on SAVING MONEY wohow $$$
I got myself a target ,and i gonna make it come true by achieving it
For sure it should be a secret now,because i would prefer prove it with the outcome straight away
Rather than talking bullshit all the day ,and got nothing to prove what has been achieved

Okay,except for being a damn workaholic,i'm busying with my new house for sure :)
So excited for my room because it's all plain white hahaha
I picked out all the furniture (for my room) in white color
As simple as possible,i have no idea since when i'm a sucker for WHITE
But no white flag laaaa XD
And other stuffs will be a contrast color for white,so guess it :)

Left another few weeks to go,then it's finally our Chinese New Year!!!
Not so excited for that but i'm glad i'm moving soon
and a new place for my 21st chinese new year celebration
Hell yeah :D

SO basically,i'm becoming such a lazy ass
So lazy to do anything
so,i'm death meat LOOL
Hopefully i could get something to be inspired
and be motivated

I'm so lazy!!!


Lastly,my wishes for this year
1) Tiffany & Co.
2) more perfumes
3) new watch,no idea what brand should go for it
4) black and long hair
5) Go travel AGAIN


By the way,i got two new rabbits
I love them so much
Thats all haha

Kthxbye

12/12/2012

好久没回来了
大家都还好吗？

今天12月12日，是个很特别的日子
在这特别的日子里 我想说的是
珍惜身边人

听大家说，世界末日快到了 是吧？
他们都说 到时没有太阳 没有日光 没有水 没有电 没有电讯
什么都没有
听起来，有点恐怖
看了那些世界末日的video
挺恐怖的

我最近陪妈咪的时间好多 都陪她走来走去的
散心，之前都忙于学业 工作和朋友
有点忽略了家人 所以这次 我都很少跟朋友出去了
因为有些朋友，可有可无
太多朋友，心深不可测
我累了，累了要一个个应付了
你们会觉得好笑，才个20出头 就累了？以后怎么出社会？
那就让我休息陪家人先吧
妈咪之前都很多次，我答应要带她去走街 结果临时改跟朋友出去
妈咪嘴里说没关系 但眼神却透露出了她的失望
一次，两次，三次...几次了
我有天晚上，我为某个事情哭了 累的流泪了
忘了锁门，妈咪进来看见了 我嘴硬说是眼睛进沙 死不肯承认说我哭了
妈咪二话不说 把我抱在怀里
在这种时刻 那么需要被安慰的时候 却得到了母亲最温暖的拥抱
我眼泪哗啦哗啦得流个不停 妈咪笑我是老baby 那么大了还哭
我告诉老天，我什么都可以不要
只求家人平安

从上次和他最严重的一次冷战后 我冷静的思考 我什么应该做 什么不应该做
刚好要带妈咪出街 我自动帮妈咪化妆
她嘴里说我发癫，其实早就准备让我化了
我帮妈咪化了好美，眼线 睫毛 眉毛 粉底 腮红 样样都齐全 都做得美美
我记得我当时看了妈咪，我觉得 我妈咪好漂亮
爸爸看见妈咪了 也愣住了3秒 就笑眯眯 说漂亮
我妈咪当时的笑容，是满足的 是幸福的 是快乐的
我不知道为何 我就因为她满足的笑容 我流了感动的眼泪
之后我们走街都手勾手 什么话都谈
什么笑话都一直笑
我勾起妈咪的尾指说 我现在没钱，以后一定赚多多钱给你
也因为知道妈咪担心我学业 所以我目前
半工半读，是很辛苦 但我愿意

前几天 还因为操劳过度 我差点晕倒在店里
我有贫血 但没那么严重过 去看了医生 才知道我发烧了
我没试过那么拼命 因为我想新年买一件衣给妈咪和爹地
所以，大致上星期一到星期天我都在做工
当然，半夜的时间就留给读书时间
妈咪开始阻止我去做工，怕我累坏
我很懒惰，有得坐就坐，有得睡就睡 但是工作起来 我就是癫
之前找到一份工，因为不受到尊重 妈咪说我们有得是骨气 要有志气
少了那一点钱没关系 至少不要让别人看不起你 所以，我都听妈咪的
都找到了很多新工作 很多公司邀请我去上班
感恩上天的安排，感谢处处都是贵人
有时像放弃读书的念头，但是他我男朋友都在一直鼓励我 支持我 给我安慰
在我最低潮时给我最大的安慰
谢谢他一直以来的包容 虽然会超级 会斗争 会冷战 会气话
但这都没办法改变 他在我心中的价值 他的无私 他的指导
让我再次不管在哪方面 都有了动力 把压力变成动力

爸爸赚钱辛苦，我不敢拿他的钱 也不让他知道我半工半读 更不让他知道我健康亮了红灯
因为爸爸也是这样熬过来的，为何我不可以？
我是女生，身体弱 但我可以照顾自己
他给我没星期的零用钱，我都收起来不花 因为他生日也快到啦
家里我最小，哥哥姐姐做工 但爸爸还要供我读书
所以，我打算毕业后 先找份好的工作 赚钱给他们
好让可以给爸爸每个月的钱和给妈咪钱去买她喜欢的东西

很多人不解，说我有钱人的女儿 千金大小姐 做什么工?
我家庭是小康之家 更不是什么千金 我是靠自己努力回来的
东西都是我自己买回来的
他们说我的衣永远不会重复 那是因为旧衣我拿来卖二手
就有钱买新衣啦 就这么简单
我因为是家里最小 所以不可以让爸爸妈咪操心
不否认，曾经的叛逆让我明白如今我更需要成熟些不让他们担心
所以 我多么的累 初一十五我念经
我特地去写了佛经 爸爸看了好开心
努力读书 quiz 差一分就满分
妈咪要买什么，我会赚钱买给她 少买自己的了
妈咪要去学什么 我带她去学
妈咪要看什么戏 我买给她看
她喜欢穿什么衣 看中了我私低下偷偷买给她
我每一天惯例 一天一次“我爱你” 肉麻得很 但我真的爱她
妈咪因为曾经是裁缝师，所以特别喜欢看美美的衣 美美的布 我都带她去看
今天还买了4片布要拿去订做自己的衣 她，笑得很开心
我发烧也带她去看，因为她的笑容 真的是无可取代

话说回来，最近不知道为什么 呼吸困难 老是头晕晕
我看，是我老了 我担心我病倒了 没人照顾妈咪
所以 我都不允许自己病倒
医生说我缺氧，怎么？杨丞琳上身哦？╮(╯▽╰)╭

要学会珍惜爸爸妈妈 珍惜身边人
一生人 就有这么一次机会做亲人
来世 都不知道还有没有机会
爸爸妈妈想要的 就是看我们成功 乖乖
他们要的并不多 就是我们健健康康的快乐成长
所以 我开始都是报喜不报忧
多顺他们的意就好了
不必在乎是否是有钱人 因为钱买不到亲情
如果你有个爱你的爸爸妈妈
请你珍惜 还有多让他们开心
他们为我们付出了很多
也是时候要我们付出一些来回报

不是名牌 不是名车
而是给予他们陪伴 谅解 快乐 和健康
这，就是最好的回报


我喜欢名牌 喜欢钱 喜欢化妆品 喜欢美丽 d
但没有我父母 就不会有这些
如果我不孝敬父母 我更不配拥有这些
万事以孝为先
所以孝顺不能等

赶快去给父母一个电话或拥抱吧
我已经给了无数次 他们都嫌我烦 虽然笑嘻嘻
我爱我父母
我希望 我能给他们更多更好的生活
因为，我珍惜

回来了 :)

两个白痴在发癫。哈哈
不管怎样还是爱你爱你 :)

好久没写部落格了
更新下最近的状态
每天都是半夜睡觉，下去起床
我很快就没命了 T.T

那天和Albee去了jonker,wohhowww.


矮矮的我，很可爱下！哈哈哈哈哈哈哈（不要脸）


这个女人，我正要给钱， 就突然要拍照 害我措手不及 不懂什么鬼pose,哈哈哈

我喜欢着风格 <3 p="p">

感谢法师从中国寄来的，这是我的！感恩~


最近过得啊，马马虎虎的...
缺钱，真的很严重缺钱 所以很努力赚钱...
最近也陪家人的时间比较多，爸爸妈妈都比较开心了
多点笑嘛，最多我每天做小丑 /.\
哥哥也回来了，笑话特别多...
最近看了youtube video各种笑话
我时不时都一直笑笑笑，时间也因为我一直笑所以过得特别快
没道理？我也知道~笑着开心没什么不好
至少啊~我知道happy go lucky的道理
我需要lucky,所以我在开路让它进来我世界
乐观吧？:)
没钱？没关系，是时候用我生锈已久的头脑了
动一动脑筋，对身体好。:)
才发现原来买了蛮多衣服，不过同时也买了我半橱的衣服
所以，我是用我卖了旧衣的钱来买新衣
当然还有一些其他自己赚的哟！aja aja fighting
最近因为笑容多了，乐观多了
很多事没想象的那样糟了！这是我开心的一点
因为我知道啊，我很会胡思乱想，有点神经质吗？或许吧  女生都这样 敏感敏感的 :(
但我尽量改了哦！
除了一直hehe haha,我都没想太多了...
因为我浪费太多时间在想东想西了...
没意义对吧？的确...

家人感情升温，男朋友感情更是每天欺负来欺负去
之前和男朋友感情，有一阵子真的是跌到谷里
好糟糕的，平时都是任性的我 突然连续几天都很冷静...
连续几天我都不联络他，也不见面
我就当做是...让彼此冷静下来的一个空间
安静的，看戏，听歌，做自己喜欢做的事，出去走走散步
主要是，倾听自己的声音...自己的心...
不想冲动做错任何事或任何决定
不想冲动说出气话
果然真的，几天后我们卸下任何一切，坦白面对...
事情就这样有了好转
也更了解我们彼此需要的是什么
吵架次数少很多，每天都是疯疯颠颠
一起在shopping mall里面，突然跳舞
一起大喊大叫
我看，很少人能加入我们，因为每个人会觉得没面子
但我就“理别人那么多，我爽，我开心就好” ...
我们要一一直这样sampat下去ok?
提往事的人，请北盏！deal!
<3 p="p">
和家人的，好很多，每天开开心心的
我妈咪最近特别开心是我最近吃得特别多
妈呀 不是开玩笑的 超级快饿
我怀疑我是不是二度发育-.-"
如果是，让我长高些好吗？( ⊙o⊙ )
【拜托..】

和朋友的感情，嗯，不错吧？
朋友来了，去了，散了
都不知道该怎么形容了
现在学会安静的享受拥有独自空间的奇妙
说寂寞？也还好，很自由
认识了新朋友，miyo.班上同学
她也是经常一个人。
我们说话超有默契!
她曾经一个人就这样去台湾背包旅行！天啊，给点掌声好吗？
太勇敢了吧？！还是我老了啊？我没这个勇气耶！T.T
我也喜欢旅行，我喜欢做饼干，刚好她妈妈是开饼干店（类似）的，我好期待跟她妈妈学习
哈哈。本来华文学会的人，找我做-资料组副组长，但我没经验 怕搞坏他们的作品
所以，让位了。都没想到接手的人竟然是她！哈哈
好巧耶！就这样那天聊了好多，好开心 :)
有默契，投契，难得呢
她不多话，但我们就聊得很起劲，她话也多了
上次还得谢谢她帮忙我add subject因为我刚好人在外，谢谢你哟 :)
我会报答你的 嘻嘻

和其他朋友，
不错呀，都有联络 <3 p="p">大家都是我好朋友，谁对我好，我就对谁好
但，我不乱相信人
友情，给了我太多次失望 所以还是走一步看一步算
不敢太大期望 我不喜欢失望
但就这样，心也就不那么累
凡事都看得很开

我记得那天打电话给我生活里出现的第一个李大仁
他的条件和李大仁都很接近
我问了他，如何学会看开？
他说，凡事都拿捏得均匀些，找到平衡点 这样就不会失去平衡
虽然他洛里啰嗦说了好多，但我领悟了是这个
现在遇到的都是小事，等遇到了失去了最亲的人才是心痛
我明白了些道理，凡事都珍惜
所以我好久都没有惹爸爸妈妈生气了，虽然有时他们突然抓kick发脾气
哈哈，就像上面所说，乐观点
一笑置之，没什么的 :)
开心就好
李大仁，谢谢你啊 :)



这个学期，希望可以拿好成绩 所以，开始准备读书了
太快？并不，因为头脑转得慢 所以 我需要慢慢来 哈哈

简单的生活就这样，快毕业了
毕业后，我还打算去工作...
去哪 就不说了 :)
秘密，嘻嘻